What you learn in your 20’s?

I just crossed onto the other side this year into the thirty’s, which is a big deal in our society today. So, I thought of writing about it. From being the eldest son in a middle-class North Indian family to a few failed attempts at entrepreneurship to running a successful self-sustained start-up, I’ve been through a lot of ups and a whole more downs.

People should realize the gravity of the situation (Indian context) when the words like son, eldest, entrepreneur are used in the same sentence. It’s not easy at all! There is this constant pressure to be the role model for everyone in the family, and almost everyone, right from maid till your grandparents, will have expectations from you. You are always expected to behave in a certain way in all aspects of life, with education, career, and marriage always trending topics.

It’s been an amazing, challenging, weird (many more adjectives) journey so far! But, I loved every bit of it and cherished every moment!. So, here are some things that I think a lot of people will relate to.

• You realize who your “real friends” are! You will differentiate between temporary people (you meet a lot of them). Cherish the real ones; the rest are useless. You also realize that relationships forged in the initial days of your puberty are the purest ones.

• You will either find the love of your life or fall into the trap of a series of unfortunate meetings to meet your future partner. It was former, I found someone I like, but that story for some other time.

• The only people who are going to be on your side forever are your close family. This is the period where you see them grow older & weaker year after year. Make sure you give them enough time (the best gift you can give anyone), respect, love, and care.

• Give up the relation if some things don’t work, but never give up on love. Trust me! You will always find the right one. Eventually, everything falls into place.

• You can never satisfy everyone and yourself at the same time. So chill, relax and make sure you enjoy every bit of it and make yourself happy. Love what you do and leave rest for people to judge. People will always judge you.

• Don’t try too many things at a time. Prioritize one after the other. Being in the 20s means that you are in a rush to do a lot; try to control your adrenaline. Love, life career choices will start banging you one over other, take a step back and then take a call on one thing at a time.

• Nothing is a waste of time. You have to differentiate between “what you need” (Job, Academics, Family, etc.) and “what you want” (Movies, Games, Comics, Books, etc.) But always find time to enjoy it or you will regret it later. You should know the importance of wasting time.

• Learn from everything around you. Right from the plumber coming to your house to fix leakage to your roommate, a coder.

• Travel, visit all sorts of places, meet all kinds of people, learn all kinds of things, try all varieties of food, experience all forms of cultures, cherish every moment! This will broaden your horizon and help you make better decisions.

• One day you’ll realize that the ultimate form of relationship is not sex or something else; it is the “understanding” between them.

• Ethics won’t make money, but they make the right choice. You will be happy with the choice you make but not the money you earn. Money should not be a parameter for any decision in your life.

• Invest in yourself, expand your knowledge. Invest in something which makes you happy; don’t have a saving mindset, rather have an investing mindset.

• There are always people more intellectual and intelligent than you. If you are the smartest in a room, then you are at the wrong place. Try to see a new person every once in a while.

• Don’t forget to invest, no matter how huge or little it might be. Investing always helps you to make radical decisions that change your life.

• Take care of your health; it deteriorates faster than you imagine—one hour a day to walk, gym, or do anything that keeps you active. As a result, our lifestyles are pretty bad.

• Stop throwing the blame on people or things around you. If you want to blame someone, blame yourself! Charity starts at home, and so does everything. Even if it’s 1% under your control, treat it as your fault, then learn from it, solve it, and move ahead in life.

• High expectation is a sin. Too many expectations cause disappointments and negative vibes; avoid them. Ideally, don’t expect anything, but alas, we are humans.

• Accept the facts, even if you are wrong. No one will kill you for it. Learn from your mistakes.
• You’ll understand that saying “sorry” and “thank you” are not the most challenging things in the world. It’s just a sign of gratitude. So be grateful for what you have.

• Stop fighting. Avoid them as much as you can; it just creates chaos in your brain and is useless. Instead, put your energy where it matters.

• It’s the best time to fail. Fail as much as you can, learn from the mistakes you’ve done and rise stronger. Don’t look around for inspirations, be one!

• Stay motivated in whatever you do. Make it a habit.

• Don’t run around for money; it will somehow always come (but is always less than what you want). You’ll always find a way to earn more than what you need. (not what you want)

• Staying HAPPY should be your ultimate goal! But, unfortunately, life to too short to mourn for every little thing.

Living in an active, pleasant, and positive frame of mind is damn important. It makes your life easier, your decisions are stronger, and whatnot!

I hope these learnings at least get you thinking.